First of all, I hope everyone did something fantastic to bring in their New Year.. I played board games with my best friends. It was a chill night for me, which got me thinking about what I want for myself in 2017 and led us to this blog post.
So every year I set resolutions and I’m sure all of you do as well. The year before last, 2015, my resolution was to work out regularly, did I? I did.. for about 9 months, then life got busy for me, I couldn’t go everyday so I stopped going altogether. I’ve also always been a mess about organization, so then in 2016 I was really avid about planning ahead and being prepared. It worked for about 3 months. I fell off the train for a week and never cared to jump back on.
Now we’ve reached 2017, I have realized that the best way to stay true to my goals is to find the root issue in my commitment to the resolutions I’ve set for myself; Balance, or lack thereof. And giving up when I see none. (Remember this last sentence. It’s important)
I’ve always been the type of person that leans towards one extreme or another. I’m the type of person that if I can’t go to the gym everyday, I won’t go at all. Same with studying, watching a tv show, or reading a book. If I can’t commit to something regularly and I fall off schedule just once, I just say whatever and stop caring about it. I’m an all or nothing type person in the most extreme way. Sometimes I take life too seriously and I know I need to work on that. I need to find balance.
2016 was really good about throwing off my balance– knocking me down, and giving me time to pick myself back up. Without the falling down we can’t enjoy the climb back up. Each one compliments the other.
Life is a constant tug of war between balance and imbalance, it’s a big chaotic mess but that’s okay. There will be weeks you stick to the choices you feel provide your life with balance and there will be days you crave to let go, live outside of your controlling nature, and just go with the flow. I hope you know that those days will be some of the best days of your life and that this helps you realize what I have; Nothing is perfect. Nothing will ever be perfect. I realized in 2016 that balance IS falling off the train and finding the motivation to get back on. I realized that balance is imbalance. But the balance you seek has always been there. It’s there between the moments you feel put together and the moments you don’t, and when you open your eyes and see that, that’s more than enough. I guess what I’m trying to say is don’t try so hard to look for your balance, it’s already there.